Annotated Fortune Cookie Wisdom

Wildly optimistic predictions:
You will live long and enjoy life.
You will soon witness a miracle.
If your cookie still in one piece, buy lotto; lucky numbers: 4, 12, 24, 30, 40, 44

‘scuse me?
Good beginning is half done.
Life to you is a bold and dashing responsibility.
In evrything there is a piece of truth.But a piece.

Passive-aggressive self-help claptrap:
Stop thinking about the road not taken and pave over the one you did.
The harder the fall, the higher the bounce.
Your life will prosper only if you acknowledge your faults and work to reduce them.

What is it with doors?
You can open doors with your charm and patience.
Jealousy doesn’t open doors, it closes them!
Patience is a key to joy.

Nonsense lines that only sound deep (but aren’t):
True wisdom is found in happiness.
A short pencil is usually better than a long memory any day.
A ship in harbour is safe, but that’s not why ships are built.

Yeah, okay:
Never spit against the wind.
Remember the fate of the early Worm.
Ignore previous cookie.

 

(written for NaPoWriMo, day 13: a poem inspired by fortune cookies. All supposed words of wisdom as found on Fortune Cookie Message (including typos and grammatical errors).)

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15 thoughts on “Annotated Fortune Cookie Wisdom

  1. Love it! I think you nailed everything except the adolescent snickers of adding “….in bed” to the end of every fortune cookie line {or is that just a USA Midwestern thing?}? Fantastic lines!

    Like

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