Mum pours tea and shoves a plate of biscuits my way. She reckons Coeliac disease is a fad.
‘I’ve landed the celebrity wedding of the decade. I’m working crazy hours, but it’s worth it. They’re spending more on flower arrangements than I’ve spent on my new car.’
Mum tuts – not the news she’s waiting for.
I’ve run my own, thriving business for a decade. But I’m 36. I’ve neither husband nor children. In her eyes, I’m planning all the wrong weddings.
I’ve stopped listening to her long ago. I hope Dad’s back soon so we can talk business.
Inspired by this week’s In Other Words: Remember no one can…
Lena leaves a voicemail. It sends my alarm bells ringing. I text to suggest we meet for lunch at our favourite coffee shop.
Lena’s waiting, looking knackered. She tells my everything. I almost choke on my panini.
‘Seemed a good idea. Still does, I quite like him.’
‘How old did you say?’
I’m as appalled as I’m jealous. If only I hadn’t pushed her into dating after Eddie left.
‘Lena, he could be your son.’
‘If I’d started too early, maybe. Eddie’s run off with a girl who’s barely even legal. Does anybody bat an eyelid? Of course not.’
It’s Week 2 of FFfPP. I’m tired and there’s other stuff that needs writing, so this is the best I could today.
‘Let’s have a look then, cupcake.’
As her manager, should Terry be flirting with her? Sheena frowns at herself in what Terry calls the uniform. More like a slutty costume. Well, it is Halloween.
‘Don’t it fit? I’ve a good eye for size, usually. I’ll get a smaller one.’
Smaller? She doesn’t dare move for fear of exposing her backside, the skirt’s that short.
‘Will the cost… I mean, uniform change after Halloween?’
Something a bit less revealing for Christmas, maybe.
‘Change? Course not. Only in summer, we don’t want you lot getting heatstroke.’
Great. She won’t last the day.
She came with the house, unbeknownst to us. Well, maybe we didn’t check the attic because if you’ve seen one, you’ve seen them all.
Or so we thought.
To be honest, she isn’t so bad. On occasion, she turns downright lucid and charming. But she hates the roofers we hired to install solar panels and no matter what we say, she won’t listen to reason.
As she keeps pointing out, this is her home and nobody asked if it was okay to sell it after her husband died and wouldn’t it make you mad, too?
We cannot argue with that.